NATURAL HORSE - Natural Horsemanship Equipment and Equine Relationship Training
HORSE JOKES AND HUMOUR

A poorly-looking horse limps into a bar with a bandage round his head. He orders a glass of champagne, a vintage brandy and two pints of Guinness.He downs the lot and says to the barman: “I shouldn’t really be drinking this with what I’ve got?”“Why, what have you got?” “About $2 and a carrot.”


A white horse walks into a pub and asks for a whisky.The landlord says: "Hey, we've got a whisky named after you."The horse replies: "What, George?"

A man has a racehorse who has never won a race. Man in disgust says," Horse, you win today or you pull a milk wagon tomorrow morning." The starting gate opens, the horses take-off, they move the gate away and there lays his horse asleep on the track. He kicks the horse and asks, "WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING. The horse, half asleep says, "I have to get up at three in the morning."


Heavenly Horse Show
One day in heaven, Saint Peter, Saint Paul and Saint John were standing around near the horse paddocks watching the horses frolic.
"I am certainly bored," stated John.
"Me too," Paul chimed in.
Peter stood and watched the horses. "I know!" Peter began. "Why don't we have a horse show?"
Paul and John thought that the idea was great except for one small detail that Paul pointed out. "Who are we to compete against, Peter?" Paul asked.
The trio pondered a moment when Peter realized the answer. "We will call up Satan and invite him to the horse show. I mean, we have all of the finest horses here in heaven, all of the World and National Champions are here. His stable is ridden with the spoiled, difficult and mean horses. We are certain to win at the show!"
And so the trio calls up Satan on the other realm communication lines and invited him to their horse show. Satan laughed and asked why they would want to be humiliated like that, because he would certainly beat them.
Peter, Paul and John did not understand. "What do you mean Satan?" Peter asked. "We have all of the National and World Champion horses in our stable in heaven. How could you possibly beat us?"
Satan paused a moment and then laughed. "Have you forgotten so soon gentlemen? I have all the judges!"